Burlap Soul

Be patient with me here... I'm fudging with things. I'm still not sure that this will be a full-blown neon layout, but right now, it's all I've got so we'll see how it goes.

Update: I like the colors and how they go so well with my photo up there, so it stays for now. I guess it just really irritates me that for all the work that I do on a template and for as many hours as I spend tweaking and making it look perfect to me.. well, none of it matters once you see how crappy it looks in other browers. I really, really want to know how to upload fonts so that everyone can see what I'm seeing.. it just doesn't make sense without some of those things, you know?
*sigh* On that note, I think I need to get some dinner before my eyes cross and I just get irritated. Let me know if anything's not working for you, ok? I'll try and do what I can to get it fixed.

I want to write, yet I have nothing to say (or at least no way of saying it currently). So you get this instead.

What's On your porch/deck/balcony Right Now? Ugly plastic lawn chairs that are stacked up in two piles, watering can for plants, broom, ice scraper left over from winter, and about 35 dead cicadas.

If you could get an honest answer to just one question from everyone you ever met, what would it be? Did you just fart? (yes, I'm that deep today.)

All of the following courtesy of Blog Ideas:

Things you would do if you weren't afraid. Head for Hollywood and try to be an actress after all, move to Europe, have a one night stand with a complete stranger, become a dancer, scuba dive, be a professional musician.

TV shows you never miss. CSI, ER, 24. (Apparently shows with long titles are just too much for my feeble brain.)

5 things you hate about your Mother-in-law. No way. I'll get in trouble with this one.

What should we do with stupid people? Stop calling them stupid first of all... and then educate them.

Write a poem about your toothbrush.
O my toothbrush, all blue and white
The way you clean with all your might
Keep me from having such a stinky mouth
How did those cavemen ever go without?

Your favorite home remedy. Spoonful of sugar for the hiccups.

Your favorite song on the radio. Jonatha Brooke's new album (they're playing it all over my favorite radio station lately and I love every song.)

Who would you want to be tied to for 24 hours. Jeff Corwin - he'd keep all the creepy crawlies away and make me laugh in the process... better yet, why not Tobey Maguire? mmmm....

Best compliment you've ever received. "You can't be in theater, Staz. You have morals."

Have you ever seen a dead body? At funerals, yes. Otherwise, no.

Grossest thing you have ever seen. Anyone that eats worms on television. I can't even think about it or I get nauseous for days. It automatically makes me throw up when I'm sick.

3 things on my desk that I adore. Bottled water, J.'s poems to me, my beloved pilot pens with the cushioned grip.

5 things about your hometown. Oh, this is good. I just came back from one of my worst weekends there ever.
1.) It's big, but you'd never know it because everyone fucking knows everyone else.
2.) It has lots of curvy roads with 55 mph speed limits.. I love driving it.
3.) There are absolutely no jobs or opportunities there and there never have been.
4.) It has one of the highest teenage pregnancy rates in the state.
5.) Sometimes it's beautiful and great. Sometimes it sucks.

Who do you blame for your mood today? Um, my hometown... and the leftovers of a bad visit with narrow-minded friends and family.

How good is your penmanship? See for yourself.

Reasons for Love
Today I choose to list the reasons why I love Gypsy
(because she's sitting next to me and I wouldn't want her to feel left out. ;-)

-- She's just the right size.
-- She's funny as shit.
-- She barks in her sleep.
-- She doesn't bark when she's awake.
-- She's got loads of personality.
-- She's extremely portable.
-- She's quirky as hell.
-- She gives hugs.
-- She likes everybody.
-- She's always happy. Always.
-- She's a good napper.
-- She's fine with the fact that she's not a genius.
-- The way she secretly carries cicadas in the house via her mouth and drops them on the floor for the cats to enjoy...
-- and then the way she looks at me all smug, like she just got something over on me.
-- She always loves me. Always.

This picture is cracking me up... and the name is perfect too. I love it when shelters get creative.

I've been in a relationship almost constantly since I was 16 years old. I've never been able to take the time to figure out who I am and what I want. I've never lived on my own for any extended period of time... at least not without a man/relationship constantly intruding upon that time.

So now I don't know who I am or what I want or who I want or what I'm supposed to do with my life. I have so many questions and it's killing everyone around me, my love for the people in my life and also, it's killing us. We still love each very much but my uncertainty can no longer be ignored.

We're meeting in a park in an hour (a neutral location) to discuss things. I don't know what conclusions we'll come to, but I know that I need this resolution like nothing before. I'm so sick of denying myself and putting so much emphasis on what everyone else says is logical or the 'right thing to do.'

I'm not asking for 'good luck' vibes because luck has nothing to do with this. I'm just praying that I have the strength I need to be honest with him, to do what's right no matter how hard it hurts and to come away peaceful with each other and most of all, at peace with myself. Prayers and good thoughts are welcome as I will certainly be needing and using them for all they're worth.

These old houses are left still standing
Creaks and cracks and worn out landings
I asked you what I should do
But we're still left with that same dried glue

How do you know if it's love or complacency
Playing house with loads of responsibility
Wouldn't that be the same as this?
Comfort = safety = relationship?

Is it really me talking? I never can tell
Years and years of mental hell
Have told me to do what's right with no wrongs
But I haven't listened to my own voice for so damn long

At this point I'm not sure what it even sounds like
My gut's quiet whispers or my brain's loud mic
I don't want to leave you, to finish what we've begun
But I'd die before I'd do what my parents have done

Settling for a man that never understands you
Marrying a woman that always reprimands you
Have a husband #2 that beats you senseless
Have a second wife that leaves you listless

Throwing 3rd and 4th and 5th spouses into the mix
How can you find love when you live like this?
Marrying the first person that asks you
Only because you thought it was the 'right thing to do'

Well, that's where I am now because of ghosts like you
Denying myself so that I don't disappoint you, you, and you
I try to hear my own voice and all I hear is your melody
'You're being selfish, this is stupid, why in the world would you leave?'

Every time I go home, I come back with this for days
Fighting the old negativity, doubting myself in every way
You always told me that I was never enough
He always tells me that I am worth so much

I just don't know who to believe
My inner voice just sits and screams
She can't stand the constant chatter
She knows it is only her voice that should matter

But why would you talk? why would you try?
When no one listens and everyone makes you cry
By the time they are quiet and I can learn
She is tired because she had to shout to be heard

But guts don't work that way, at least I don't think
Full of sudden realizations and blatant epiphanies
So how did you know? 'Oh, I just knew'
Bullshit, I say, like that's enough for you?

Everyone had that moment, that time without question
He said this or she did this and then that permanent connection
'We felt it so strongly that we just knew...
Doesn't it feel that way for you?'

Well, no, no it doesn't and I'm not sure if that's good or bad
I know where we first kissed, I know the way he held my hand
But I never heard a voice saying, "Oh, he's the one!"
Though honestly if I had I most likely would have run

All my life I've had to deal with treacherous and uncaring men
So when I got a good one, I had no idea how to begin
It went nicely and I felt confident and grown-up
Then I guess it just seemed natural to say we were in love

I never listened to my inner voice, the one's that been here all along
So much crap I've thrown myself into without listening to my own song
She said, 'What are you doing? You need time before you say that word!'
And I said, 'Yeah, but we're moving in together, haven't you heard?'

My life has seemed to move so fast that I haven't had time for me
Surviving this, destroying that, realizing this, questioning these
How do you hear your own voice when there are so many inside your head?
How do you know that what you're doing isn't exactly what they intended?

We live a nice life, we have a house of love and laughter
But I couldn't honestly say that that's what I am after
I want a life of passion, I want what everyone else has
I want to know that I didn't stay with him just because it pleases my dad

He loves me so much, I know that that's true
The way he holds me, loves me, tries to come through
But maybe I'm just not what he deserves and I've denied it too long
Maybe when everything is right, it can still be so unbelievably wrong

I've always questioned us, always wondered 'what if'
Even when things are good, even when my heart is his
Even after beautiful moments, even when discussing rings
There's been a voice, a tiny voice, that just won't let me go for this

But if I have so many questions, and I've questioned for so long
Doesn't that mean that my gut knows it's wrong?
I mean, why would I have to question if it felt so right?
Right = the moment = connection = this is for life?

He's told me I could take a trip, two whole months off
But what if I come back and still feel so damn lost?
Or what if I come back and know that it's not right?
How do we separate our stuff, our hearts, our love, our life?

Is it possible to come back whole, when you've been so damn shattered?
Can you pick up pieces on the road and suddenly know what matters?
Is there something out there that's going to click for me
Or is just another question to another lost epiphany

I want the moment, I want to 'just know'
I don't want the life, the love, the marriage that's so-so
I want to feel passion, I want that undying ember
I want the vibrancy of Autumn without the coldness of December

I can't guarantee what I will do now, or where I will go, or how
But I have to resolve this, have to know something, somehow
I've told him that this might be worth so much
But he wonders if two months will be long enough

I have to say he's right, I've wondered the same damn thing
If I can really come home in two months and be ready for a life and a ring
What am I searching for? Clarity, realizations, epiphanies?
Or am I just being selfish like my dad says and ruining things?

It would be unfair of me to marry him with this uncertainty
I told him this and as usual, he patiently agreed
I told him I couldn't guarantee I would show up on our wedding day
As usual, his silence is deafening and he has nothing to say

I know he's quiet by nature, patient, dependable, shy
But I like the flamboyant, passionate, proactive and sly
He loves argument, debating to the Nth degree
I can't stand it, would rather let bygones be

He says he always wanted a girl that was different than him
I guess that's what he found, me with all my wild whims
But I get so tired of the differences, this mundane yet cozy life
Maybe I am high maintenance, maybe only psychosis keeps me satisfied

I've had the men that are natural romantics, full of flair
But they almost always went crazy or vanished into thin air
How am I supposed to understand something that I've never had?
Maybe I'm really just scared of having someone so much like my dad

I decided long ago that I was done changing men
But how sad is it when I want him to be more like them?
It has nothing to do with a need for chaos, that's now long gone
But more to do with a need for romance that lingers on and on

I've tried to ask him, to request, even beg and plead
I've bought the books, I've given him tips, told him what I need
But he just says, 'Sorry, I just don't think that way' like it's all he's got
And I'm left seething, wondering 'Well, why in the hell not?'

You sent me cards when we were dating, at least twice a week
Called me up to say you missed me, or to quote an MST
You built me a palm tree with an indoor luau when I was sick on our anniversary
You programmed that robot to write a dry-erase love letter just for me

Now suddenly you say that's all money related to 'how much I spend on you'
You know that's bullshit and that you just no longer know what to do
I've given you ideas, I've told you what I like, what I need
And if you'll notice, those cherished things I've listed, they were all free

I'm not trying to change you, I'm not trying to make you feel bad
But I do want some passion, I want those things from men that I never had
I want to know that you love me as much as you did in the beginning
But really, I want 'I love you' to be an action and no longer just a thing

I am having the shitty day that beats all shitty days. Strangely, I have no idea why. The weekend's been good. I just woke up to a crappy morning and my mood keeps plummeting as the hours go by.
Part of it is probably the fact that I start summer classes tomorrow and I really, really don't want to fucking go. Classes already? Yeah, it's only 5 days a week for a month, but my god, I didn't even get a break yet! I swear, I don't think I've ever had burnout this bad before. I don't know that I can take this for another month.
I need to see the ocean and I need to see it soon. I need to hear those waves, stand in that sand, feel the sea's undertow as it pulls the negative from the depths of my soul. I need that peace like never before.

Remind me again why I decided to take summer classes five days a week at 9:30 am? Me, a die-hard night owl that absolutely cannot function before noon. What in the hell was I thinking?

I just changed my schedule so that instead of 9:30 to 1:30 every day, I'm going from 11:30-4:00. Muuuuuch better. Now the hard part will be waking up the dog and making her actually go outside before noon. I think she's an even later sleeper than I am.

Speech 101 and Animal Learning (psych requirement) are possibly the two most boring classes that I'm required to take for my bachelor's, but at least I'm getting them over and done with in the space of a month. It's only day two and I'm already counting the days before the entire five weeks is over. *sigh* Talk about a challenge in motivation.

First Ronald Reagan and now Ray Charles. We're losing some of the classiest people of our history and I can't help but wonder...who's next?

I've been a Ray Charles fan since I was a kid and first heard and saw him on tv one day. His laugh was infectious and just always made me smile. His voice, his melodies, his piano, his humor, his heart.. nothing moves me or makes me stop and sway like a Ray Charles tune. I have a vast collection of Ray's tunes, but I just can't find a single one that exemplifies his legacy like "Georgia." Though it's beautiful and perfect in every way, I choose to share this one with you instead. It's one of my personal favorites... best played by a crackling fire in winter.

Enjoy (Right click as save as please.. this will be gone after tonight):
Ray Charles & Velma Middleton - Baby, It's Cold Outside

Rest in peace, Ray. You'll be very sorely missed.. but I will think of you when your music is played at my wedding.. and forever after.

Edited to add this one as well: It's another of my favorites and I've been listening to it all day. Absolutely love it.
Ray Charles - Drown In My Own Tears

Songs are gone now. Sorry!

Lo and Behold... The photoblog has been updated.
[If you don't know the password and I even remotely know you, email me. Chances are you'll get it within a few hours.]

After 3 years of our landlady saying to us that she would never do this without consulting us first, my gut instinct has been verified and she did exactly that.

She is selling the house from underneath us. We have 24 hours to prepare for a sign in the yard and the first showings. I am fucking livid.

Ahhhh, this week only gets better. Our internet is currently shut off and won't be back up until Friday night probably. So if it seems scarce around here, you understand why.

The good news though? I just delivered my first speech of the summer term (in speech class - timed and everything). And even though my visual aids completely screwed up, I winged it and still got great applause and even laughs. Oh what the hell, I'll say it outright: all that audience feedback made me feel really good. :-)

Granted, I'm a day late on this one, but why do these things only get celebrated for one day anyhow?
Happy One-Year Anniversary to Jess and Michael!! Much love, good wishes and joy to you both!! I know you will have a wonderful life together! :-)

No particular reason for my mood tonight.. though if there was an exact reason, I'm not sure I could even articulate it. But sometimes songs just do it for me, ya know?

Every sad note makes me want to cry
Every happy person makes me full of envy
Every angry person makes me annoyed
Every new word makes me want silence
Every ounce of silence makes me crave words
Every ounce of dissent makes me long for agreement
Every ounce of agreement makes me hungry for change
Every ounce of change makes me full of fear
Every ounce of boredom makes me want to die
Every ounce of certainty makes me crave newness
Every ounce of newness makes me crave certainty
Every ounce of space makes me crave closeness
Every ounce of closeness makes me crave space
Every ounce of sunshine makes me crave rain
Every ounce of rain makes me crave smiles
Every ounce of happiness makes me crave sadness
Every ounce of agitation makes me crave violence
Every ounce of violence makes me crave fulfillment
Every ounce of fulfillment... well, that never comes

Every time I feel empty, I say I will fill it myself
I never do
Every time I feel full, I say I will share it
I never do
Every time I feel friendly, I say I will call or write
I never do
Every time I feel compassion, I say I will give a hug
I never do
Every time I feel that weird emotion, I say I will be the first to say "I love you"
I never am
Every time I feel tired, I say I will go to sleep
I never do
Every time I feel unhealthy, I say I will exercise
I never do
Every time I feel unfulfilled, I say I will take the chance
Yet still.. I never do

And I wonder why I still have nights like these
It should be no question when I remain motionless in my own life
How does complacency have such a hold over me?
I pride myself on being truly independent
I pride myself on taking no shit
I pride myself on following my muse
I pride myself on being my own person at all costs

but it seems that it is only my words that get cashed in and I am the one going broke without the funds to back them up
I don't know how anyone does this like they do
I don't know how people have the courage to love another person
I don't know how people have the desire to follow their dreams
I don't know how people have the wisdom to know when they're too tired

I just don't know anymore
but I do know that I'm sinking and I don't know how to stop
I've never been a good swimmer
I've always hated putting my head underwater
Something about it always scared me to death

Every time I feel tired, I say I will go to bed
I never do

Because I know you can't get enough of my live meme'ing action....

So for the past week I have been driving myself mad, racking my brain for a topic on my informative speech that was due today (Monday). I sit down and fill three notebook pages with possible topic ideas that I have some amount of knowledge about and could possibly discuss coherently for 5-7 minutes.
Finally, I decide to just pick a photographer that I like (Annie Leibovitz if you're curious) and go from there. I go to the library and spend many painstaking hours trying to find all the necessary books and photos for my visual aids. I sit down and start to create an outline, trying desperately to fend off my nagging feeling that this speech is going to suck because I'm not as passionate about this topic as I was about my last one a week ago (dog tricks if you're still curious).
Eleven at night on Sunday: I'm sitting at the computer, desperately aware that my speech is really sucking and that my topic is kind of sucking because I have no motivation to discuss photography with all the incoming 17-year-old freshmen in my sorta fun and laid back summer speech class. I start freaking out.

Five minutes later: I'm standing in the kitchen with J., discussing possible topics I could do on very short notice. Stuff I know a shitload of information about and could still drum up a works cited page in order to prove it - without having to set foot in a library.

J: Stephen King? You have every damn book he's ever written.
me: Nah. ... Well, maybe. .... I guess. ... I don't know.
J: Tori?
me: ..... nah. I can't really explain music through just words, ya know? I'd need to use music files and that takes up time and gets distracting.
J: Yeah.
me: This is driving me nuts. This thing's due tomorrow and I don't know what in the fuck my topic is. What do I do?
J: [sarcastically, as though it's a joke of a suggestion] Hell, why don't you just do blogging?
me: *pause as this painstaking and obvious topic has just now smacked me in the head*
J: I mean, you've got every article and works cited page you would need right there on the web and you've got the personal experience to back it up.
me: *still pausing, as this really sinks in*
J: What?
me: *start doing insane little happy dance* I've-got-a-topic, I've-got-a-topic.... thank you sweetie.
J: Anytime.

So there you have it. I did an informative speech on blogging today. I've officially become one of those "dorks of the future."
So where's my Dorks Guild of America card anyway?

You know what? I'm learning that it's much easier to sit and compose blog posts in your head rather than actually sit down and type them out. Hmm... imagine that.

So here's a brief list of what's going on with us lately, as I seem to have lost all of my full-sentence writing skills. ;-P

My two nephews and my step-sister/cousin (read the about page, ok? or if not, just know that the tree forks) decided to stop in and see me today while they were on a little field trip to the Newport Aquarium. I didn't realize they'd be spending the night. So it's a damn good thing I skipped classes today and decided to clean this place extensively. Otherwise I'd be spazzing out about all the shit that didn't get done tonight. So woohoo for me and my productivity!

Anyway, as I was kind-of saying, my two nephews were here all day and are now sleeping soundly to cartoons downstairs in the guest room. They are ages 3 and 8 and damn, are they crazy-energetic! Not hyper or anything, just two fiesty boys. We ate some Skyline chili, walked to the elementary school playground, ran and jungle-gym'ed our asses off with Gypsy and then came home and played Twister. That's more movement in one day than I've done in years! (I feel so old. My 8-yr-old nephew Kyle looked at my Twister game and said, "What's that?" Man, what in the hell kind of world is it when an 8-yr-old hasn't played Twister? WTF?)
Finally, they started to get tired. Holy crap! Those of you with kids, how in the hell do you do it? I've done so much physical activity in a space of 7 hours that I'm half-dizzy and still trying to catch my breath.
I have to say though... there were some nice moments. For instance:

-- I loved the expression on their faces when we hooked up my Halloween black lights and they stared at each other's greenish-hued teeth for the longest time, laughing uncontrollably. Hysterical.
-- Kyle, when walking up the narrow staircase to the attic and staring around in amazement. "Hey! This is like a secret passage to another place!"
-- The normally very moody and very hard-to-please 3-yr-old Alex, proclaiming loudly to his mother on our sidewalk, "Hey mom! I'm having fun!"
-- Alex, standing in the middle of the Skyline Chili parking lot, stopping suddenly and pointing straight up as if the world had just stopped. His jaw dropped, his eyes totally round and dilated, exclaiming in a voice so loud that everyone could hear it across the street, "PLAAAAANE!!"

These kids are great kids, even though they're currently going through a split between their parents (and getting away from their abusive father as well). I know they've been confused and kind of sad for a while. It made me feel good to see them laughing so much within a single day. Tomorrow may be a different story entirely, but for today I actually had fun hanging out with kids. Weird. I'm usually very paranoid and skittish around them, fearing that I'll say or do the wrong thing at the wrong time and make someone cry. But today I did okay.

I don't know if I'll ever have the necessary strength and patience to be a parent, but I know that I'm a damn good aunt. And I like that.

I just went back to my old blogger archives and then checked around here at burlap soul. My very first blog post ever was on June 27, 2002 and my first post here at my own domain with MT and everything was June 16, 2003. So I guess you could say that I'm "between blogiversaries right now." Wow... has it really been two years since all this started? It certainly doesn't seem that long. I'm thinking that's a good thing though, correct? ;-)

I'm too exhausted to really make a coherent entry tonight.. but let me just say that the show tonight fucking rocked... even though someone stole every single piece of their equipment the night before. Everyone took up a collection for them and they seemed really moved by that. Amazing though, how the show absolutely rocked out despite everything.
Oh and did I mention that I got some nice signage and face time with each of them? (I asked them to sign each other's photo because they work so well together. They seemed flattered by that.. or maybe I'm just flattering myself.) I'm on such a high right now.. I should probably just go to sleep while I'm still smiling. :-)

In an effort to hide the endless damage that has been done to this place because of us and our five cats restore this house to its natural condition, we have been basically busting some home improvement ass this past week. Hence, my lack of posting.
But this weekend, we tackled the big projects that desperately needed to get done and I have to say that I'm kind of in shock about all the stuff that we did.

For instance:
-- Finally finished restoring/staining hardwood in the office (still deciding what to do about all the nasty old discolored/rotted wood spots though. I'll be damned if I'm replacing any wood in this house. It is what it is - old. So I guess that's that.)
-- Scrubbed with bleach every piece of white trim in this house, so that all the nasty fingerprints and kitty-markings have been completely erased. (those stains that are still left will be touched up with white paint soon enough.)
-- J. restoring the carpet in the hallway - and it looks amazing!!
-- J. beginning to restore the carpet in the basement hallway (that massively soaked cat-urine spot (created by Ghost) that has seriously stunk up this house for the past year.. yuck!! Oh, but then we actually saw Ghost use the litterbox for the first time in a year after the stained carpet was gone!! Holy crap!!! woohooo!! Maybe I won't have to call in a behaviorist for these annoying territory issues after all!)
-- Back door painted back to ugly hunter green
-- Basement somewhat organized and even swept!
-- The mess of the attic has begun gradually coming down the stairs and working its way into boxes
-- Everything that's been boxed is now piled neatly in the office (it looks like we're actually organized movers! ha!)

I'll be so glad when we finally get out of this place and just scrap everything. If we're lucky, we'll be able to just ditch everything and start over with spankin' new furniture. Oooh! New stuff! Pretty!

Matt Maupin may be dead. I just don't know what to think about this. I didn't know him personally, but I do know that his entire hometown community has rallied around him like something I've never seen before. He's from an area we call Eastgate. We go there just about every day to get our groceries and do whatever else needs to be done because it's a huge shopping mecca. When we first moved here, we seriously considered buying a house that was very close to where his family lives. Now whenever we take the long way home from shopping, we see news vans parked outside, along with the army trucks that are there just to keep them out. As you drive through the backroads of Eastgate, you can look into homes and see candles in all their windows. Every time we go to the stores there, yellow ribbons are wrapped around poles and his picture is plastered everywhere. People have been dropping messages and prayers of hope into boxes at every local retail outlet around here since his capture. People at my college wear yellow ribbons and t-shirts with his photo on it. So many people around here knew him or went to school with him.

I don't want that video tape to be him. I don't want it to be anyone's son or daughter. I don't want this city to be smacked with the shock and grief of his loss like it will be if this is true. But then again, who does? Who wants any of this to happen to them or their own family? The sacrifices that our armed forces make every day in order to protect our freedoms continues to amaze me. I can't imagine what it must be like to be in his family's shoes.

My thoughts, prayers and compassion go out to the Maupin family tonight. I know it may take a long while, but I hope that someday they will find peace.

Oh my god!! I saw it! I saw it for myself! J. told me it happened the other day, but I just didn't believe it until I saw it with my own eyes! For the first time in two years, Ghost is using the litterbox!! She totally just pooped in the box!!

Sorry, but after you've been forced to walk on sticky urine-soaked carpet every day for the past two years, this is a big fucking deal. We were terrified that once we removed that patch of downstairs carpet, she'd find a new spot to ruin that we just wouldn't be able to fix. I was even starting to think that I'd have to get rid of her or give her to a family with no other pets, because these territory issues were driving us out of our minds. You have no idea how much I love my Ghoster Girl, but this was really starting to make me crazy.

But not to worry! She is using the box again after two years!!** Wooohooo! I mean, really.. isn't this just the most beautiful thing you've ever seen?! Yeah, baby!

Okay, guys. I need some feedback and I need it fast. I have to give a huge persuasive speech on Thursday (complete with visual aids and everything). However, even though I've checked out massive amounts of books, I'm still undecided about exactly which topic I want to do. It's been narrowed down to two thus far:

Remember, this has to be a logical and concise 5-7 minute speech. I have to quote sources (which I have plenty for each) and I have to make a logical argument for my case by applying it to everyone, not just relying on a possible audience of "animal lovers" or emotional appeals.

Go for it. Pick one and tell me why it's a good speech topic. You've got until about noon tomorrow (wednesday) and then I have to pick a topic and really start busting ass on this thing. Come on.. you people are smart. Give me your vote!

I found this over at Sporty's place. I can't tell you how perfect this is, but I still love it regardless.